Despite its title, this book is big. In 44 chapters with headings like Maybe I Am Not a Person, Stern writes about how anxiety shaped her life, and not for the better, beginning with her childhood, when she dreads leaving her beautiful, eccentric mom, who she believes needs her protection. Somehow, Stern has succeeded in writing an often-funny tale about mental illness. For example, she explains her belief that a local Mafia figure, Jimmy Alcatraz, keeps her Lower Manhattan neighborhood safe. Stern recounts how, though clearly intelligent, she performs poorly on traditional school tests, which causes problems with college admissions: I can't even get into what is other people's safety school. A guy stalks her; she chooses a bad boyfriend. Until she turns 25, she doesn't know what's wrong with her. Today, at 47, she realizes that left untreated, anxiety disorders, like fingernails, grow with a person. Don't expect a traditional happily-ever-after ending; but don't expect a gloomy one, either. Stern's story is a good reminder that all people, including those who learn differently, need empathy and human connection.--Springen, Karen Copyright 2018 Booklist

Stern (The Long Haul) courageously lays open her excruciating experience with 25 years of untreated panic disorder in this brave memoir of mental illness. From the time she was a small child growing up in New York City, Stern found terrifying possibilities in everything-what would happen if she lost her mother or she herself was kidnapped, what if her family lost their house, what if the constant testing of her intelligence revealed what she suspects. that she is different from all other children. She is eight years old at the time her worst fears are made real in 1979, when six-year-old Etan Patz-who lived mere blocks from her family's Greenwich Village rowhouse on MacDougal Street- disappears without a trace, and Stern's close friend Melissa dies of a brain tumor. Before she found her considerable talents in the theater and in writing, Stern tried coping through unhealthy behaviors, including an increasing dependence on cocaine. Failed relationships further reinforced Stern's feeling that there was something broken inside her, along with the heartbreaking belief that her constant worrying kept those she loved safe from harm. Readers who have had panic attacks or have experience with a similar disorder will instantly relate to Stern's experiences; those who do not will come to understand the disease's terrifying power-and the utter relief that comes when it is finally identified and treated. Honest and deeply felt, Stern's story delivers a raw window into the terrifying world of panic disorders. (June) © Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

Novelist (The Long Haul) and middle-grade author ("Frankly Frannie" series) Stern outlines her childhood and adolescence with a series of vignettes that slowly unravel her anxious life in New York City. She intertwines conversations with neighbors, friends, and teachers with doctors' appointments and notes in her medical files. The tension only increases when a child is abducted a mere few blocks from her home. A tense home life and lack of mental health awareness creates frustration. The author's acute attention to detail and conversational tone will capture readers' attention, as she gives voice to young people who might also be struggling with similar situations and could learn from the challenges she faced. VERDICT This accessible personal narrative is for readers who have been touched by divorce, anxiety, or are looking for a new perspective through memories of -childhood.-Meghan Dowell, Beloit Coll., WI © Copyright 2018. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.